# We’re a shoes-off household. Is it rude to ask guests to take theirs off, and what if I’m the guest who’d rather not? > A pile of sneakers by the door says a lot. Here’s how to keep your floors clean without making guests feel ambushed, and how to be gracious on the other side of the doormat. URL: https://courteo.us/daily/shoes-off-at-home-guests/ Series: The Daily Dilemma No. 7 Published: 2026-10-27 Author: The Courteous Editors Category: Hosting at home **The verdict (Yes, with notice):** Yes, it’s your home and your rule, but give guests notice and something comfortable to wear. As a guest, follow the house custom without fuss; if you have a medical or mobility reason, mention it privately and the host should accommodate it. The doorbell rings, your friends spill in with a bottle of wine and a pie, and you see it: boots, damp from the sidewalk, heading for your pale rug. You hover, wondering whether to say something or just quietly suffer. Meanwhile, on another night, you’re the guest at a party where everyone is in socks, and you’re wearing knee-high lace-up boots, mismatched socks and a fresh blister. It’s awkward because shoes are personal, an outfit is planned around them, and nobody wants a house rule sprung on them at the threshold. But floors are personal too. ## Why it’s fine to ask, and how to ask well Shoes-off is mainstream in the US, even if asking isn’t. In a 2018 YouGov poll, [87% of Americans said they take their shoes off in their own homes](https://yougov.com/en-us/articles/20063-most-americans-take-their-shoes-home-dont-expect-t), yet only 10% always ask guests to do the same, and half never ask. Most people are flexible about it: in YouGov’s 2022 survey, [55% of Americans said that as guests they will do whatever their host prefers](https://yougov.com/en-us/articles/41054-where-americans-put-their-feet-down-shoe-debate), while 24% of hosts said they’d prefer guests remove their shoes. So guests mostly expect to follow your lead; they just need to know what it is. Etiquette expert Diane Gottsman advises hosts to [tell guests before they arrive](https://dianegottsman.com/2024/01/21/etiquette-of-asking-guests-to-take-off-their-shoes/) rather than at the door, set up a spot for shoes, keep a basket of fresh socks for the unprepared, and make sure the floor is spotless, since expectations about clean floors go both ways. You don’t need a health argument to justify it. The research on germs is real but limited; Popular Science found studies showing bacteria on shoes and entryway floors, but noted that [none connects this to actual infections](https://www.popsci.com/health/how-gross-is-wearing-your-shoes-inside-poop-germs-lead-poisons-allergies/). The same article cites a 1997 EPA report linking shoes-off homes to lower carpet-lead levels, a more concrete concern in older houses. Either way, “it’s how we do it here” is reason enough. ## What to say > **If you’re the host, in the invitation** > “Can’t wait to see you Saturday! Heads up, we’re a shoes-off house, so bring cozy socks or grab a pair from the basket by the door.” > **If a guest arrives unaware** > “Welcome in! We do shoes off here. There are slippers right there if you’d like a pair.” > **If you’re the guest and need to keep yours on** > (Quietly, to the host.) “I’d love to follow the house rule, but I need my supportive shoes for my feet. I wiped them well. Is that okay?” ## When the answer changes - **Medical and mobility needs.** Orthotics, diabetes, balance issues, braces: hosts should accommodate without discussion. Offer clean indoor shoes as an option, never a lecture. - **Formal parties.** If you’re hosting a dressy cocktail party, a no-shoes rule clashes with what guests planned to wear. Say so on the invitation, or relax the rule for the night. - **Contractors and delivery.** Workers may need safety footwear. Offer shoe covers or a runner rather than insisting. - **Cultural households.** In many homes, shoes off is a matter of respect, not housekeeping. As a guest, follow it gladly; our [etiquette by country guide](https://courteo.us/cultural-etiquette-by-country/) covers where it’s the norm. - **As a guest, plan ahead.** If you suspect a shoes-off home, wear easy shoes and decent socks. > **Courteous rule of thumb** > Tell them before the doorstep, and give them something soft to stand in. Guests: follow the house custom, and save exceptions for real needs, raised privately. More hosting manners in our [dinner party etiquette guide](https://courteo.us/dinner-party-etiquette/). ## Sources - [YouGov — Where Americans put their feet down on the shoe debate (Feb. 2022, 1,000 US adults)](https://yougov.com/en-us/articles/41054-where-americans-put-their-feet-down-shoe-debate) - [YouGov — Most Americans take their shoes off at home, but don’t expect their guests to (Jan. 2018)](https://yougov.com/en-us/articles/20063-most-americans-take-their-shoes-home-dont-expect-t) - [Diane Gottsman — Etiquette of asking guests to take off their shoes (Jan. 2024)](https://dianegottsman.com/2024/01/21/etiquette-of-asking-guests-to-take-off-their-shoes/) - [Popular Science — How gross is wearing your shoes inside?](https://www.popsci.com/health/how-gross-is-wearing-your-shoes-inside-poop-germs-lead-poisons-allergies/) --- Courteous (courteo.us) — Modern manners, researched. Markdown version of https://courteo.us/daily/shoes-off-at-home-guests/